Wednesday, September 30, 2009

autumn blessings

[using this also for my thousand words thursday]

ive totally missed you for the past few days.
its flu season. i work at a children's hospital.
so, that should explain my short disappearance.

its been such a perfect day.

i am sitting here now, on my patio, as this fall weather has settled snuggly in east Tennessee. with laptop in hand and a warm latte on the side, the breeze is cool and crisp. the sun shining brightly from the east. the leaves have begun to change; the occasional one floating and landing beside me.

this day is perfect.

i love fall.

i love fall in east tennessee.

taken this beautiful morning

the beautiful sunrise over the mountains

the maple leaves are my favorite in the fall

Saturday, September 26, 2009

saturday sweetness

i love lazy, rainy saturday afternoons.

it has rained for over a week now, give or take a few days.

we spent the majority of the day on the couch, with the windows open, listening to the rain dance off our flowers onto the ground. aaah. so relaxing. the cool breeze has been much refreshing, after a rather humid last few days.

hope you got to spend your saturday with the one you love.

Friday, September 25, 2009

music, music break

i have been such a slacker with my music breaks. boo!

this song is great. i ♥ the group.
[note to self: i should by the CD for my birthday]

a glass of whine

i wanted to whine for a minute, last night.

it was too late to call anyone.
my husband has been all whined out.
& my mom hates the subject of the topic i wanted to whine about.

so, it was just going to be, me and you.

but, i turned off the monitor. moped to the bedroom. and eventually after the thoughts ceased and my tossing & turning ended, & i drifted off.

so, here i the corner of my world at work, wishing i was anywhere, but here. its raining out. has been actually for days now, it seems. i do love the rain. its perfect weather for the excuse to read all day. but, i could use a little sunshine right now.

last night, i wanted to whine about something that is really a big deal. major, actually.

and im really processing what my feelings should be. i kind of stink at the whole, "how do i really need to handle this" decision. there's this fine line that i really don't know how to approach. do i take one step over the line and sink to the level of others or do i stand back. stand strong. & just keep my thoughts and facts opinions to myself?

i guess i choose the stand strong part.

even though i dont feel so strong right now.

its not been a good week.

i hate feeling weak & defeated.

i hate not getting out what ive put in.

i hate situations that haven't been true.

i hate that my feelings are so broken hurt over someone and/or something that doesn't deserve all this energy.

im not convinved time heals.

perhaps only makes it worse.

but thats what ive been told to give it.

so perhaps, it will prove to be just.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

from ETSY, with love.

my most favorite time of the year has [finally] arrived & im so very;


& i love a scarf. i own a million. & im ready to add a million more. 

cool weather. a pumpkin spice latte from starbucks. orange, yellow & red leaves. bonfires. a new scarf.
happy fall

i'm ready to carve
a pumpkin.

 1. i want it in every color.  2. this one is so funky & sassy.
3. i've already ordered this one.  4. a must have color for fall.
5. i LOVE this one. 6. this owl is adorable
all these are adorable. i think i must
order all of them 

Monday, September 21, 2009

the little black box

having recently bought some amazingly discounted scrapbooking stuff, this weekend my darling hubbs finally retrieved my photos he had placed accidentally in the attic, a few months ago, so i can take over the dining room table for a few weeks and get to work on creating some new, actually my first, albums.

while happily moving through the hall way, he came in from the garage and eagerly announced, "i brought your little black box down".

i stopped. i turned. i know i had this giddy smile that landed across my face...and there it was....

my little black box

my little black box contains everything, from the moment we first met until it got placed accidentally in the attic. since, i had 2 shoe boxes in my closet that have been serving the purpose. sure, i could've went to the attic...but its really high up there. you have to climb a ladder thingy. and it could be possibly be creepy. so this was def a job for sweet hubbs.

i quickly take the box and run to the kitchen island, where i frantically start pulling stuff out. ive looked in this box a trillion times, but each time, its like the first and my body falls warm and tingly, all over again.

i see the faxes he used to send over to my office, saying how wonderful the last three [which refers to our first 3 weeks] weeks had been.

notes telling me not to eat dinner, as he was bringing it to me.

the score card to our first bowling adventure. what a fabulous time.

pictures of our first valentine's day together, where i was flown on a surprise romantic weekend getaway.

then there were the cards from the flowers, he'd send me on business trips, telling me how much he missed me & to hurry home to him.

random balloons he would have hung on a chair in the house.

rose petals in zip lock bags, w/ the dates he had spread them.

sweet love post-it notes, he would place @ various times on the bathroom mirror, my car, my closet.....

random scavenger hunts we would had. the one with the non-setup jello-o, was classic.

this box is amazing. its filled with so much love. so much emotion.

i have such a brilliant husband. in my emotional-scatterbrained-non-stop world, i worry that i fail at being the best i can be, as i am a very, very, extremely very lucky girl.

when i explore this box. i see the obvious. i am loved, unconditionally. flawlessly. deeply. perfectly.

& i feel guilty for every saying anything about the shoes he leaves in the living room, the clothes he leaves scattered on the bathroom floor, or even the silly little messes he makes in the kitchen. that's the worse he does. i feel guilty for not dividing my time appropriately, when i am his world & he is there for me, whenever. wherever. i feel selfish for asking for his advice, then sometimes going my own way. i feel ridiculous for going spastic-and-getting-all-worked-up over something, that he said all along, "would be ok."

he is really amazing.

my life is simple. he only asks that i love him. im so lucky i can. and forever, i will.

 i am a very, very, extremely very lucky girl.

strolling through centennial olympic park - valentine's day 2009

it was here, our first "i love you" was said
over 8 years ago.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

my A-Z guide at just the right time

doing some sunday afternoon reading, i ran across a few things that i personally have been questioning lately. turning 30, has been a huge thing for me, since my twenty-fifth birthday. i was twenty-five until last year, when i finally stopped whining about it and accepted it has a good thing; a new an exciting era to live and accomplish things that i have looked forward to, or a new beginning to do things that i have put off. so, unlike prior reservations, i will not spend the day in bed. with a box of kleenex. a gallon of chocolate ice cream. and photo albums of pre-thirty years.

im sure like most, everything didn't go as planned for me, in my twenties. and with less than 2 weeks left, i don't think i have much time to accomplish the things that i didn't. reality is, i can't dwell on the past. this is something i have got to learn. i think its one of my husbands biggest knudges. "let the past rest. learn & move on from it. you only borrow stress". i have to agree with him.

in this months issue of Redbook Magazine, there was an article titled, "Get Everything you want. Your complete A-Z guide".  there were only a few that hit close to home and got the ol' wheels a turnin'. i was greatful for these random bits of advice. somehow, they came at just the right time.

A all the affirmation you'll ever need
it directs you to find a meaningful mantra that can instantly connect you to your best self, while providing inspiration and comfort. it informs you to choose a word that suggest what you want in life. although there are many words that came to mind, as well as phrases from other literature and poems, the one listed fit me perfect. i choose love i will now practice saying this as instructed, when i awake and before bed. i will say it during the day when stress settles in or i will say it when met with opposition. if i consistently choose love, there should be no dull moments or crisis. less stress and no drama. this shall be my new mantra. what's yours?

B better customer service
this was directed right-to-me. i think the author had gotten complaints from charter's technical service department about me. i needed this advice. i assumed all along that this company had only hired idiots to answer the phones to i guess what was an attempt to help with our issues, but only to successfully pass us along to 7 others with 7 different languages. i always end up slamming down the phone. maybe if i would not become so stressed during this time, i would have more luck. although this is really a minor, silly thing. with charter you have to call alot, so there have been a lot of hangups. so now, anytime i have to call an 800 number for a customer service related issue, i will now be on my best behavior.

G the guts to say what you really think
i stink at this. if a situation calls for confrontation, i always just beat around the bush in order to "protect" their feelings, while mine are just getting trampled. i am alot better than i used to be. growing up, i had no "stand up" about me at all. which in younger years, they really weren't needed, except to defend myself from my older brother. teen years, it would've been nice to have. now, although i will portray my feelings to someone, its never full honesty. i will only say minimum in order to protect them. screw my feelings, right? they surely don't care. so not to be spiteful or mean, i will work on this. i come first. i look out for me. that's what is important.

H an hour of peace and quiet
this never happens. not that my life is super busy. i am just so scatterbrained at times, that i am constantly going from one thing to the other, to accomplish the "one thing" i started on an hour ago. this will defiantly be a change for me, even if it doesn't involve nightly bubble baths, serenaded with the soft keys of Yanni and lit softly by candle light. perhaps i should find pleasure in just cleaning the kitchen, listening to soft music or a new tune.

J a job i really love
this has been a huge struggle for me since 2006, when i was laid off, then decided to be a stay at home foster parent for 2 years, only wrapping that up with a try in a new career. sometimes change isn't good. unfortunately, i have found out the not so happy way. my professional career will get back on track. the medical field is just not for me. corporate america, i'm running back to you!

K good karma
although i am total southern baptist, i do believe in karma. i think its roots are from knowing right from wrong and the golden rule, "do unto others as you would have them do unto you". i should work on my karma. get in tune more with myself. i think somewhere over the past few years, with things being so out of norm, i lost a little bit of my true identity. this defiantly tops my list.

L you deserve love
i do! and thoughtfulness. and affection. and attention. i will do more. give more. even if its not reciprocated in all aspects of my life, i will be the one to come out on top.

O to be more outgoing
i am outgoing to an extent. defiantly not the crawl-on-top-of-a-table while dancing all night &; all drinks are on me - type of outgoing. no longer will all my eggs be in one basket, its to easy for them to break.

Q quality time
i will shake up my solo routine! my habits sometimes fall in rut and i don't produce enough time to include time needed for family. friends. charity events. i will defiantly add more jazz, and the peeps i love, into more areas of my life.

V Joie de vivre
the joy of living.
i will cultivate my own joie de vivre by taking pleasure in all aspects of my life, big and small....and finding a balance between mind and body.

so now, i will await my thirties and smile as they are approaching.
the anticipated changes are exhilarating. i see good things. accomplishments. growth.

i see a breathe of fresh air. 

Saturday, September 19, 2009

home, sweet home

this weekend was started by having dinner with two of my long time, best friends - much needed time, i should add. 
these are 2 of the friends i referred to in a post a few days ago, and i love them dearly. 

my husband works for a wonderful company, that someday i think will present the opportunity to move away. we have talked about it, of course. how awesome and exhilarating it would be to uplift and move your whole life & start a new adventure. new cultures. new climates. new friends. new parks. new cuisine. Seattle, for some reason always tops my list. perhaps, the rain and cool weather - most of the year. 

but for now, our home is here, with our family. our parents are the world too us. i live only 45 minutes from my parents, my home town and often feel light years away. i find it silly actually that i ever even entertain the thought of moving away. im sure i wouldn't last a week. 

 im from a very small town, actually. a little, little city. it really has no more than 3 red lights and an interstate, sitting amongst a few rivers. it was the state capital for a day. that was always a U.S. Government assignment during school, to go to the courthouse and copy the monument. i should honestly have it memorized. by everyone's junior year in highschool, it was your life plan to move out to the big cities. after all, you had to drive 30 minutes to get the mall. dine-in restaurants. and since the explosion of social networking sites, i was amazed to find that so many of these people destined to leave town the day after graduation, still live there today. they work there. they have started their on family there. i used to find it quite amusing but now i am realizing that the older i am getting, the more i really could move back there. 

its peaceful. beautiful. its a simple town. an older town. its just home. 

kingston, tennessee

this is one of our pharmacies
that's been around since my parents
 were babies. 

this is a view of downtown.
you can see the courthouse
& TVA smoke stacks.

this is a fort at Ft. Southwest Point
There was a battle here, you can
find out more by google'ling.

this is our greenbelt in the city park.

the First Baptist Church on the main road.

this is the main dock 
across from our high school.

this tops many barns in the area.

a gazebo at Whitestone Inn.

we really have beautiful land 
for such a small town.

a beautiful barn
these are common throughout the area.

this is my land.
this is my home.

Friday, September 18, 2009

thinking softly.

sorry about the pathetic brilliant post the other day. this week has been stressful and i have just been busy so busy. i am excited to spend the weekend catching up on my favorite blogs.

as ive gotten older & my endless curiosities of what google can produce, i have taken a greater interest in my house. ive always been, well bluntly OCD about where things go. how clean things are. where not to put something. everything has a place & it has to be there. im sure most thinks that sounds normal, but not in my household. im maybe, sort of a little bit of a control freak when it comes to my house and am fanatical about everything. but its my house & i am allowed too. plus, its pretty, overly clean. all the time. & thats great.

i find humor in how personal style changes, when once you couldn't live without. once as in only, 16 months ago. im now in the phase of everything in every room & every thing in my house needs to be new or redone. im no longer the "pattern" person. i totally love rooms full of softness and neutral colors; overflowing with plush pillows and sophisticated simplicity. my younger years held patterns of big & bold prints with matching lamps, busy wall decor and silly matching light fixture plates.

i chuckle as my head slowly shakes back & forth & my mind quickly produces the appropriate words...
"what was i thinking?"

im ready to go on a mission and i can't wait to share our renovations. first stop, our bedrooms.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

a girl of few words

today was defiantly a funky, didnt-go-with-the-flow at all, could've-crawled-back-in-bed & burried-my-head, non-productive day. yuck!

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

we are the lucky ones

recently, i discovered that through life events, you find out who your friends really are.

a friend is:
     someone you laugh with, endlessly.
     someone you tell all your secrets too.
     someone with an unbreakable trust.
     someone you can't imagine going a day in your life, without.
     someone who invests as much time in to you, as you do them.
     someone who makes you feel as important, as they are to you.
     someone who will never turn their back on you, even through a hard time.
     someone who is a million great things that can't all be listed.

i remember my friendships as a young girl. they were not complicated at all, only carefree. they were simple. they were honest. they were pure.

you met under the fort on recess & spilt the days secrets, knowing that "cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye", that they wouldn't be told to anyone.

there were the meetings at the crossroads, racing up to the woods, with sack lunches in tow - to spend the summer days reading. drawing. laughing. playing....riding bikes, squirting the water guns and the icky boys, until you heard your parents shouting from the distance that it was time to come home for dinner.

all the countless notes that we spent the whole periods writing, to make sure they were perfect and not leaving out any detail from the previous hour, so we could pass after class in the hallways.

as we got older, it turned into endless telephone calls. driving around after school, working the little PT job to have money for Friday's after the game. a new pair of jeans. or the latest bath & body scent.

 it was all so simple.

then life happened.

ive been blessed with several life-long friends, who are indeed my bestest friends on this whole big planet. im thankful for those friendships. cause see, these paticular friends are still pure. life doesn't always offer us simplicity but these friendships have never failed. through any trial, error, rejoiceful time, exciting time; these girls have always been there.

how lucky are we, the ones who have been fortunate to experience true friendships. friendships that are constant. friendships that are there, always. friendships that are pure. friendships that are love.

like many things in life, friendships too come and go. there are a few who are fortunate enough to make genuine, new friends along the way, minus complications and unforseen obstacles. & for these friendships, how greatful we should be.

if you have a friendship worth holding on too, be sure you do.

because we are the lucky few.

Monday, September 14, 2009

no highheels on a hiking trip

not to many weeks ago as i was taking an afternoon stroll through blog land, i came across a quote, that i decided to steal borrow as my own.
"its like kenneth cole meeting coleman".
"hmmm!", i thought. "i totally relate".
 let me explain.
growing up in a small [not really quite so city, city] city.
make-up, high-heels, & coordinating jewelery were breed into you,
starting at birth with dresses, matching shoes & frilly socks, i was always a poster child for Proffit's [now Belk's]. im sure, through looking at pictures, i had coordinating blankets.
as years transitioned into teen years, appearance and all things girl, were a requirement of my daily routine. i remember "dressing up" to go to the mall, which was always like a vacation, as we just weren't a mall family. but, i look back now and imagine what a dork i looked like, wearing probably my sunday's best with white hose and shiny black patton shoes, while everyone else was running around in their tight fit 80s jeans and a oversized shirt.
i would've laughed at me.
but, its how i was raised. dress well. your best. at all times.
so, as an adult, i dress well, my best. at all times, but with a disclaimer:
i will trade my labels in for a faded pair of liberty overall's, anytime!
married into a family with a passion for mountains as deep as my love for the latest Sephora eye shadow, i was forced welcomed into a whole new world, one i had never known.
what? no electricity? no cell phone? no cable? are you serious? just call me when you get back!
this was normal conversations pre-engagement. they were not getting me in those creepy-muggy, bug infested, snake slither'n, dirty muddy, woods. never.
but i went [was kidnapped] once. & from that day forward, my passion for the mountains feel quickly as did my love for my hubbs.
as a girl in a mountain world, there are alot of compromises that all must make on a trip, as my can't-live-without-the-conveniences-of-home demands, must be met. at all times.... but i'll gut a fish & hunt w/ the best of them. thank the cotton-genius for pink-camo!
so, if your afraid of the great-out doors, like i once was....seriously. take off the heels. put on a hoodie & grab some jeans. get the coleman set [latern, cooler, tent, etc] & go.
trading the heels for some hiking boots.
you'll fall in love.
pink'y promise.

the heels will be there when you get back home.
nothing can compare to a weekend in a place
like this [above].

i love new friends.

9/14/2009 - premier week (friend makin monday blog post)

if you would like to participate, head on over to this blog.

Since Fall is {almost} in full swing, you know what that means!
Season Premiere week is right around the corner!

What are some of your favorite fall shows?

Thanks to the invention of TiVo, I have too many favorite shows. Seriously, I probably should be almost embarrassed to list them all. So, to not incriminate myself, I will only list a few:

Lipstick Jungle • Dexter • CSI: Vegas • 30 Rock • The Office • Rules of Engagement • Cake Wrecks •
Cake Boss • How I Met Your Mother • Big Bang Theory • The Biggest Looser • Smallville • Fringe • The Mentalist

Friday, September 11, 2009

the unshaved leg

so, here is a story of the unshaved leg.
that i realized had wrote itself, unknowling. well, forgottenling [yes, a word],
when i woke up this morning & sweet hubbs was on the far side of the bed.

it all started last sunday afternoon.
a nice, warm bath had been ran, overflowing with bubbles. soft music playing.
the set up was nice.
i go through the ritual of taking a bath.
shutting the bedroom door,
opening the closet door,
then shutting the bathroom door.
weird, but the bath just somehow feels cozier that way.
so, i undress. get in. aaaah. nice. exspecially after a hot, muggy weekend camping.
i get the shaver. and start my right leg. and just as i finish....the phone rings.
i jerk open the shower curtain. stumble for a towel to dry my i can get the phone.
i answer. its a call ive been waiting for, thus the production to get to it.
i tell them to hold on. i hop out. dry off. slip my robe on. & proceed to talk.
& it was then i proceeded to talk for hours.
hours past bedtime.
hours past the time i needed to finish the other leg.
then came tuesday; work. a busy day. home late. straight to bed.
wednesday came & went; full of errands & house work.
then there was thursday. a long work day. home late. bed.

so the hubbs this morning, informed me it warded off him.
the way we sleep. he kept feeling that leg.

i shower daily. lotion daily.
am i apparently this scatterbrained?

but its now apparent that our love for male face scruffies in no way equals the love for female leg scruffies.
both legs are now even.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

a quickie

if you love pictures.
& you love blogs.

here ya go.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

tuna sandwhich & a big side of i so don't want this for dinner.

that's what i got.
actually, tuna minus the bread.
its all i had time for, really.

it was defiantly a night where, after accomplishing the cleaning of 7 rooms, i was destined straight for the couch. and having cleaned the above mentioned rooms, i had no time for the grocery store. our work never ends. this is a true statement. the darling hubbs worked only a half of day today & lethargically watched from the couch as i was drifting in circles around the house. im not sure i still quite understand his game plan. perhaps maybe sitting still in one place avoided spreading dust back on the tables?

aww. now just how sweet is that

from ETSY, with love.

fall is just around the corner and i love autumn scents.
[they are the yummiest.]
& having a love for etsy; here are some adorable soaps.

1. adorable autumn harvest 2. mmm. punkin pie 3. this is the sweetest, ever: soapsicle 4. take a look at the these sweet, hootie-owls. 5. A fall must-have; candy corn. 6. plump, juicy, candy apples.


its official i am the worlds most indecisive person. after months of trying to come up with the perfect blog name, and a few exciting times when i thought i had, i really have this time. whew. no wonder sweet hubbs gets annoyed by me. i annoy myself. so, ignore all requests before. all previous blog addy's ive sent out before. because they are all just plain wrong. and old. and yucky.
the new and only blog address ever i will have is: it will take a few days to completely published, so in the mean time it will be this.

thanks for your patience

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

hitting the brakes!

im inserting my least favorite word here: uugh!

as i sit and type this, i officially have only 31 days

until i turn the big "30".

a little history....

my 25th birthday, was wonderful.
probably the best i had ever had.
& up until last year, i was "25".
then began all the talks from family and friends
that, "isn't turning another year older, so much
better than the alternative?"

sure thing! i realized at that moment, it totally was....
& that i should stop being "25" forever, and look
forward to each new year.
so, at "29"....i was happy. i was looking forward
to "living" in the "30"s.
that's what i heard you do.
you learn in the 20s.
& live in the 30s.


then repeat...
as i sit and type this, i officially have only 31 days
until i turn the big "30".
i’m not giving up my juvenile viewing habits of watching Anchorman and Team America over and over to make sure I memorize every funny quote.

it’s now near scientifically impossible to fit that many candles on a regular-sized cake.

the days of partying on rooftops with cases and cases of Bud and scantily clad men, finishing the late night downing pizza, pancakes or burgers (or all three) at IHOP are numbered. Now I’m expected to sip wine and dress nice during Martini Night at the local museum.

every slice of pizza or buffalo wing I need to take a Pepcid. Later I have to down an entire bottle of Pepto Bismol.

my trash can in the bathroom has a magazine, atlas and newspaper on top like I'm running a reference section of a library.

toys I played with as a kid are retro and back in style. (Transformers and Care Bears, to name two) Similarly, I find myself regaling youths about stories of “back in my day.”

ive decided i had better get a rubber mat in the tub--just in case!

i read....

"as the milestone quickly approaches, (the 30 milestone, not the incontinence or pantsuit milestones-fortunately, I have yet to hit those), i realize that turning 30 is a turning point. When I was, 25, I was sure that 30 was going to be this magical turning point when I suddenly get all my sh*t together. I wouldn't feel "old," per se, but I'd feel more content, secure. Life would be less of an emotional rollercoaster. I'd probably even be completely done with my quarterlife crisis!"