little successes.

Aaah, head hunger. I had never heard of this little concept, until a few short weeks ago.Thankfully, I now know how to and am so far doing well in conquering this little rascal. We went over for a quick visit to my in-laws last night. We walk in and she is serving up homemade kraut w/ weenies, beans, mashed potatoes and cornbread. Before my mouth floods with desire for this unbelievably delicious southern cooked meal, I catch myself studying my stomach; nope - not hungry. nope - not good for me. nope - not liquids. As hard, hard, so incredibly hard to have an hour visit and walk out with out even a nibble, was a huge victory for me.

I eat lunch with 2-3 other people, daily. I've stayed strong to my shakes, sugar free Jello-o's, applesauces and teas and broths. Having to sit and watch them eat the fattening goodness has been so terribly hard for me; when we've done it since day 1. Today was chinese takeout; another success. It's the hardest to sit through the agonizing i want to eat that's but once I make it through, I'm sure like so many others it's such a victory and a tremendous sense of accomplishment. Through this short journey, I've sadly realized that I was officially addicted to food. Like an old nasty drug, I couldn't wait to get my next fix. It makes me sad that I consumed so much time eating and thinking about eating and to go even further, not holding myself accountable for what I was eating. Oy! 

The new me is coming together nicely. I can say shedding all the bad decisions over the last week, I've found some new energy! We are going to tour the Hospital's Wellness Center this afternoon; I get a free 6-month membership post-op and a hubby pass ($27/mo), as well as a nutritional plan/evaluation and 3-free personal training sessions. Jay has lost -14lbs. since we began this journey; he is a trooper and the best support person a girl could ask for!

I think for my birthday, which is coming up in 19 days, I may ask for a bicycle. Wow! Me? a bicylce? never thunk it.