Monday, December 8, 2008

i do it for

im confused as to why people would want to be in a relationship where there is more misery than excitement? more sadness than joy? more anger than love? i see around me, so many relationships that i just dont understand. i see tears cried. hear pain in voices. see unhappiness in faces. these people talk of leaving, but yet they dont. and everyday it is something. i just cant seem to wrap around what it is that keeps them there. i can understand years with someone and one scared to be start over. but when they endure so much, so much negativity, so much hurt, i dont understand. i cant understand.

so, does there come a point when advice should just stop being offered? i mean, when everyone's advice is the same to these particular people, but its never listened too, and they keep themselves in the situations...its exhausting to continue trying to help. you love these people so much it is just insane watching them be so miserable.

there is no perfect relationship. there are going to be bad days. its life. people get out of sync. its going to happen. but if i was in such a miserable situation; i would want to be happy. i would want to listen to the advice that so many friends offer and try to coordinate it into my life, to help. i would want the best life for me. i would want to be happy.

im so thankful for the relationship that i have. 10 years; i cannot believe it. it seems, seriously, like it was just yesterday. i was young, 19, nervously i was ready in my soft yellow GAP cardigan set and jeans, hair fixed perfectly, with soft curls...standing at the front door of my parents house listening for the camaro to come down the road...i heard it...ran inside and waited for him to knock. i opened the door and my heart melted. we had been talking/dating for over a month. we were going Christmas shopping in my town. my first local public appearance. it was great. i was so proud to be by his side. and to this day, i am still proud. more proud. totally in love. we get out of sync on days, just like everyone else does, but no matter what the day held, he cannot wait to walk thru that front door, everynight coming home from work, and hug me & kiss me like it's the first time he's saw me in days. all the simple, little things he does, that he knows will bring a smile to my face. holding hands at the mall; his touch, melts my heart still to this day. its love. im so happy. i just wish that everyone could have the love that we have. were not perfect; but our love is.

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